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Peer Talk

How Do I Get a Crush?

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That’s such a great question and it can be really difficult to answer. When it comes to getting a crush on someone else, it usually just happens. Maybe they’re really nice to you, or there’s just something about the way they look like their eyes or hair. Maybe they’re into the same type of music or activities as you. Most often, you can’t control who you get a crush on and you definitely can’t control whether they will also have a crush on you. Sometimes crushes can turn into really great relationships, and sometimes even into love. Other times, crushes can end in a lot of heartache and hurt.

It’s really normal to want to experience having a crush, it’s normal to want to be able to love someone else and to experience having someone else love you. It’s also really normal to be fearful about love and crushes too. As amazing as those emotions are, the hurt that happens when crushes don’t work out can be really intense. Rejection sucks, and it doesn’t matter how old you are, it hurts a lot. It can be really important to use the people in your life who you can count on in moments like these, your friends or family, or even us at ConnecTeen. Just because you’re in pain doesn’t mean that you have to be alone.

Because you won’t usually know if someone else has a crush on you or they won’t know that you have a crush on them, you might need to take a risk and let them know. You might be surprised and find out that they’re into you but you should also be prepared that they might not be. It’s important to remember to respect them if they say that they’re not interested and it’s also important to remember that just because they said no it doesn’t mean that everyone will say no. When you feel the hurt of rejection, you can talk to other people about it, remind yourself of the great things about yourself, even if you don’t feel great at that moment. Practice self-care and do something that you enjoy, whether that’s listening to music, writing in a journal, hanging out with friends, or playing a sport. Whatever you enjoy doing can be your self-care.

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