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Peer Talk

I like self-harming but I’m wondering how do I stop if I don’t have any reason or motivation to?

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When going through tough times, it’s normal to look for different ways to cope with or forget the pain and emotions that they’re going through and feeling. Self-harm is one method people turn towards in order to cope and is something that affects many people. People who self-harm choose to feel physical pain to forget or temporarily remove themselves from their emotional or psychological distress. When all the emotions and stress are being pent up inside, people often look for an immediate way or method to be relieved of those emotions or stress.

Self-harm is a way to cope, but it can be dangerous for you as you are left susceptible to infections. And even if you believe it to not be dangerous or if you believe that there isn’t any reason or any motivation to stop self-harming, just know that there are other methods to cope that could be more beneficial to you that are out there, but of course, it is really your choice on which method you would rather choose. However, we would encourage you to just consider other coping mechanisms that might be available to you, such as talking to a trusted friend or family member, or practicing self-care that entails doing activities that you enjoy that really focus on you and your emotional and physical well-being.

Talking to people can be beneficial because letting someone know what you’re going through, even if you might feel embarrassed or ashamed, can help them help you. At times, if you feel that your friends or family members aren’t there for you, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they don’t care about you or love you. Maybe they don’t necessarily know how you’re feeling or know how you’re doing if you don’t open up to them because they may not know that you need help or support. You don’t have to go through everything alone. You deserve to get help and be supported at all times. And if you really don’t feel comfortable talking to a friend or a family member, we’re always here to talk to you too.

Other coping mechanisms in order to make sure that you’re taking care of yourself and putting yourself as your first priority include listening to music, watching television, reading a book, writing in a journal, taking a bath, exercising, or going out for walks for fresh air. Anything that you enjoy doing in your free time, or anything that you believe could distract you, may be something you try, and may be a healthier and more beneficial way to cope with whatever you’re going through.

Everybody, at some point in time, will deal with stressful and tough situations and it is definitely okay to react because it’s human instinct to react and want to feel better and find ways to cope. But making sure that you are healthy, both mentally and physically, is essential so that you are in the right mind space to make safe and healthy decisions.

If you’d like to talk to us more about self-harming, or anything else that’s going on in your life, please don’t hesitate to call us at (403) 264-8336, text us at (587) 333-2724, or chat with our volunteers online at as we are here to listen to you and support you. And if you are in any immediate or emergent danger, please don’t hesitate to call 911.

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